I blog for Change.

As I attempt to orient the windy and often treacherous roads that encapsulate life, here are some of my thoughts on the successes, failures and ultimately the hope and positivity in which I strive for a better world. I also hope that I can use this blog as a platform to elevate the social justice issues that are somewhat forgotten in the modern discourse of staying silent on issues that challenge. Sx

Roots, Branches & Leaves.

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I was prompted to think about friendships over the weekend in the most unexpected but refreshing way possible. During a post work beverage(s) session on Friday evening a complete stranger posed an epiphany like analogy that I haven’t been able to stop pondering over. In a moment of sheer clarity this person explained his ‘3 types of friendship’ concept that upon further thinking and application to my own life seems like the truest revelation of my life. The metaphor explained further refers to that of a tree and its 3 appendages being roots, branches and leaves.

So it goes a little something like this: friends who fall in the roots category are those who exemplify stability, they are your truest of pals who despite what befalls us in life will just always be around. Those who fall in the branches group are more than acquaintances and somewhat steady, however our relationship with them is a little more on fluid ground and therefore can snap and break at any occasion. The leaves of our lives on the other hand are only there on a temporary basis and while the few months that they are around may be vibrant and colourful, they will eventually discolour and fall away.

What an amazing analogy right? The more I thought about it the more I realised the importance of the nuances in each category. I myself am far too guilty of holding on to the ‘leaves’ in my life instead of understanding that they are by nature only temporary. On the other hand I tend to take the ‘roots’ for granted. I forget that the depth of these friendships constitute to unconditional love. An aspect in which as a friend very rightly identified, we may not always like each other at certain times during the ebbs and flows of life however the nature of our connection defines our enduring presence together. As for the branches, they represent the floaters in which mean something to me but again, for whom I cannot expect unyielding presence and loyalty. Instead their company should be enjoyed and their influence on my life respected.

To that charming, British gentleman who blessed us with such a gem at the most unexpected of moments, so much gratitude and love! You provided us with a much needed metaphorical mirror to look at the way our deepest of connections are represented within our own reflections. To those #rootsforlife friends your ride or die connections are innate and therefore utterly cemented within the complexities that make this existence so complicatedly beautiful.



Author: es.el.gee

Sabene is a development practitioner, activist, writer, blogger and intersectional feminist. She currently works for CBM Australia and manages its East Africa & Philippines portfolio of Community Based Inclusive Development programs. Sabene’s expertise specialises in the intersection of gender and disability. She is passionate about equality and social justice and serves as the founder and editor of SpeakYoTruth, an online publication aiming to elevate the voice of women, specifically women of colour, women with disabilities and those who identify as LGBTQI. The platform seeks to create a safe space for women to speak their own unique stories and raise issues which are most important to them as individuals.

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